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Arab League warn situation in Syria could end up worse than Middlesborough

Arab League ministers have again warned President Assad that if the situation isn’t resolved quickly, the country could descend into the levels of violence previously only seen in Middleborough on a normal Saturday night.

Roads are continuously blocked with piles of burning tyres, masked menĀ  shoot at advancing tanks with home-made catapults, and children wander the streets aimlessly with grubby faces and sad looking toys. Middleborough Council say these things have been going on for years, and they can see no way forward.

It’s stalemate. They attack, we retaliate. We capture a few streets, they take a few more. The fog of war lies heavy in Middlesborough.

Ministers have said the Syrian President needs to stand back and see that the situation can’t continue as it currently is. They’ve repeated warned his options now are limited.

He must make a choice, stand and fight and maybe win and live like a king, jump in a dusty hole and be found by the Americans and then hung, hide in a dusty hole under the road and be found by the Syrians and then shot or come live as a king in another Arab country.

The warnings have so far fallen on deaf ears. Correspondants have reported that all calls to the Presendential offices are answered with “Whatever”.

The warnings come following the announcement by President Assad that he and his family had cancelled their summer holiday to Euro Disney.

Not that we do, but if we had been using helicoptor gunships on civilian areas, don’t you think I’d be better at coordinating that from my bunker?!

 

Image source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/richard_collinson/2112033775

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Posted by on July 20, 2012. Filed under Asia-Pacific,zParody Fake Newsz. Post tags:,
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